Job Search Guidance
Job Search Guidance
"The world breaks everyone, and afterward, some are strong at the broken places"
- Ernest Hemingway
Sometimes you get to choose the job transition timeline and sometimes it is chosen for you. If the decision is made by the company, then maybe you sensed it coming and maybe you didn’t. Even if you sense it may happen, the reality of it will be a real shock to your system. This is not an easy day and the night may be worse. You will experience being Shell Shocked the day off being let go.
If you haven’t watched the movie, ‘Up In the Air’ that came out in 2009. You should. George Clooney and Anna Kendrick star in this film and it is all about job layoffs. Clooney’s character is a charming professional whose job is to fly around the country and fire people. A hired gun, so that the managers of that company don’t have to do it and it gets done correctly.
The movie walks you through the typical process of letting an employee go and many variations around it. The general process involves a meeting that is called by your manager and then HR suddenly is at that meeting. You, your manager and HR are the usual attendees. The manager will give you the bad news and then the HR person will walk you through the details of the process. It is traumatic and it happens in a short time frame.
Within 15 minutes of the start of this meeting you will likely be standing outside the building holding anything you were allowed to grab from your office. Sometimes you aren’t even allowed to do that. They will send your personal affects to you or you will be asked to come back afterhours. So there you stand with your whole day and week suddenly open in front of you.
Day 1 is particularly difficult. You will quickly find yourself at home, at your spouse’s work or possibly at a bar with no work or co-workers around you. The agenda you had for the day and the people you thought you would be interacting with are suddenly not there. The unexpected void is jarring, and unfortunately gives you time to think and think and think some more.
You have to recognize that you are going to be working through anger, stress, grief, loneliness and disorientation. Emotions will be high for you and for those around you. The first step in this process is to recognize these emotions and start to process them. A mistake will be to ignore or repress them.
The image illustrates the five stages of grief, a model developed by Elisabeth Kübler-Ross to describe common emotional responses to loss or significant change.
Denial: This is often the initial reaction, where individuals may struggle to accept the reality of the situation, sometimes accompanied by feelings of shock or disbelief.
Anger: As the reality sets in, feelings of anger may emerge, often directed towards others, the situation, or even oneself.
Bargaining: In an attempt to regain control or postpone the inevitable, individuals might try to make "deals" or negotiate, often with a higher power.
Depression: This stage involves feelings of sadness, withdrawal, and potentially a sense of hopelessness as the full impact of the loss is realized.
Acceptance: The final stage involves coming to terms with the reality of the loss and finding a way to move forward, though sadness may still be present.
It's important to note that these stages are not necessarily experienced in a linear order, and individuals may revisit stages or experience them in a different sequence.
A suggestion for this day is to talk to a few friends and family members. You will have a lot to process and rather than sit there running scenarios and arguments through your head it will help you verbalize them to someone that can listen. Don’t go to someone that will try to fix things, just find a trusted listener.
It can also be helpful to ground yourself in the reality that life is not work and the world continues to spin on its axis. Go take a walk outside and breath in some fresh air. Time will be a key component in working through this. Life hasn’t ended. You just are starting an unexpected transition in an important area of your daily life. Process, breath, digest and then start to plan and build for the ‘next thing’.
