Find a second kind of adulthood with your career transition

Chapter:  What the journey of the soul demands

"One has to know that every day is a war between the constrictive colloquies of history and the invitation to the high seas of the soul. But such an adventure is what our life is about, what real adulthood is about, and what the journey of the soul demands."

- James Hollis, PhD 

‘Living an Examined Life’ is a book that I have been working my way through and finding some interesting ideas about how we can or should approach life.  The book is not a quick read, and I have been taking a chapter (they are short) at a time.  One of the sub-titles of the book is, “A 21-Step Plan for Addressing the Unfinished Business of Your Life.’ 

Whenever we transition from one career to another, this is a significant milestone in life and gives us an opportunity to confirm or alter our life path currently. Whether you have jumped or were pushed, the opportunity is still there if you can marshal your courage to pause, reflect and plot your course.  We are all Captains of our own ships in the seas of life and we are, or should be, the ones controlling our path.

Hollis writes, “The second adulthood comes only when a person, for whatever reason, is called to accounts – a sinking marriage, an affective storm, a moment of terrifying emptiness at three in the morning.  Yet this hammer blow begins the possibility of a turn to a second, different kind of adulthood.” There is an opportunity to find a second kind of adulthood with your career transition.

A job transition can sometimes be this type of hammer blow.  You can feel betrayed, your perspective may be that you are operating without a safety net, you could have sleepless nights, and this can be scary.  There is a reminder here that we need to provide for ourselves and our families, but life is also not defined by your job.

Hollis then continues a bit later, “There is no going forward without a death of some kind: a death of who we thought we were and were supposed to be; a death of a map of the world we thought worthy or our trust and investment; a death of expectations that by choosing rightly we could avoid suffering, etc.” The end of a career phase, means the opportunity to begin something new.

The image of a death is dramatic and seems like an exaggeration for a job change.  However there are parallels.  You will change your daily routine, the places you travel to will be different, the people you interact with will be different and the daily activities for you will be different.  Perhaps ‘Rebirth’ is a better descriptor in this case.  There is an ending, but there is also a beginning, and there maybe a couple beginnings.

The first beginning may be the transition into a search phase.  This will often give you sleepless nights and cause stress.  However, it’s an invitation to reflect and think about what you want to do for the next phase of your career.  It is also an opportunity to ground yourself with friends, family, nature and what feeds your soul.  Take the opportunity provided to you for some introspection.  Everyone’s unique financial situation will likely dictate how long you can reflect and deliberate. Take the time you can.

The first/second beginning will be the start of the next J-O-B.  New people, new culture, new responsibilities and perhaps a totally new career path.  This can be fun, but also scary at times too. Most people will expect only positive reactions from the change, but the reality is that there will be negatives too. You will go through a bit of a crucible and this will make you stronger. This can also be part of what makes life worth living…the new experiences that are available to you.

Carl Jung once observed, “The only unforgivable sin [in life] is to choose to remain unconscious.” There are good sides and challenging sides in a job transition, but most of the process will not allow you to remain unconscious about your life and its direction.  Embrace what you can during the process and be thoughtful about where you chart your course for the next journey.